An Escape from Reality

As I told you all last week, our family had gone to the beach, and I wouldn't be blogging for a little while. Our vacation was cut a bit short by the current natural disaster terrorizing the eastern seaboard, so I'm now writing to you from my usual spot in my kitchen.
It was bittersweet driving back today. I was sad to leave the shoreline again. I grew up close to the ocean, close enough that I could go every weekend in the summer. I even lived on the beach for an entire summer, residing in an old WWII barracks next to the country's oldest lighthouse. There is something about the ocean that makes me complete again. It brings out the essence of me; it makes me feel like myself again. To use the words of a wise man: the beach is my "reset button". It resets me to what is my normal self again.
On the other hand, I was glad to be coming home. I have only a few days left before my maternity leave is over and I have to return to work. I'm looking forward to a couple of days at home just to get some things done to prepare myself for this huge change. Beardface and I have worked out our schedules so that we don't have to send BabyGirl to daycare. This was a non-negotiable for us. We always said we wanted to raise our own children, not have someone else raise them for us. Of course, at her young age it would be easier and more logical for me to stay home with her, but that isn't possible for us at this moment. So my husband will be home during the day while I go off to earn our daily bread. It will be helpful to get him used to caring for her all day while I'm around to help, and I know it will take BabyGirl some time to get used to eating from a bottle.
Reality had to hit me some time, and now is as good a time as any. On Monday, I will go back to work. I'll leave my baby daughter with my husband while I spend my weeks earning paychecks. I always thought I'd be bored being a stay-at-home mom; in college I mocked women who chose to postpone or forgo a career to raise their children. Now I find myself jealous of them.

Lord, give me the strength to do what I need to do for my family at this time, and give me the wisdom to know what is right for my family. And Lord, let me remember that the two people I love most on this earth will always be there to greet me at home.